Who is Adrienne Neta? US family scarred by their mother's final screams before Hamas attack hold out hope for her survival
Adrienne Neta is one of the many American citizens affected by Israel's conflict with Hamas
2023-10-11 14:47
Andrew Tate’s teen fan skips school to support him outside court amid ongoing human trafficking case
Despite bans from several social media accounts, Andrew Tate continues to engage in controversial topics on X
2023-10-11 14:28
Big China Hedge Fund Calls on Government to Buy Stocks, End Rout
A leading Chinese macro hedge fund called on the government to set up a stabilization fund to buy
2023-10-11 14:26
How to support someone coming out in their 30s and beyond
Coming out can be hard at any age, but by the time you’re well into adulthood it may feel terrifying, and be completely life-changing. Many people who come out in their thirties and onwards may have wanted to for a long time but not felt safe enough to do so. As October 11 marks National Coming Out Day, it’s important to reflect on how, if and when people can share their authentic selves. “I wasn’t raised in a time when it felt safe to express attraction to women,” says author and creative mentor Fiona Fletcher Reid, who came out last year at the age of 35. “I wasn’t sure about my sexuality until I had psychosexual therapy and was able to explore all the layers of internalised homophobia and repression that I had accumulated over my 35 years,” she says. So, how you can support someone who is going through it? Don’t assume everyone is the same Not every person’s coming out looks the same, and some LGBTQ+ experiences are not universal. “Coming out is a personal experience and because it is often physically and emotionally dangerous to be openly queer, lots of people never feel able to be open,” says Fletcher Reid, now 36. “Some people might feel free to come out once they have ended a particular relationship, or after meeting people who they feel safe around. “For others, like me, it’s that we don’t consciously acknowledge our sexuality until we are a lot older and have the confidence to work through the emotional implications and real-life consequences that come with that,” The writer, from Glasgow, was going through a divorce at the time with a man she’d been with since the age of 17. “During therapy, I talked a lot about the pain I was experiencing during intercourse as well as my general anxiety around sex. It wasn’t until I’d built up a trusting relationship with my therapist that I felt able to discuss the fact that I thought I might be gay and I did not expect that to come up, so I was just as surprised as everyone else when I came out.” Don’t question their authenticity Validate what the person who has come out is saying. “Don’t say, ‘Are you sure?’ because you can rest assured that the person coming out to you has thought long and hard about this,” says Fletcher Reid. “Casting self-doubt on someone when they have opened up a vulnerable part of themselves to you is hurtful.” Don’t question them about their sex life It’s no one else’s business. “Please don’t ask about whether they have been intimate with anyone, or any other sort of suggestion that they need to ‘prove’ their sexuality to you,” she stresses. Consider what they feel and accept that it is a big deal They are probably feeling “a mix of emotions, including excited, happy, empowered and scared for their safety”, says Fletcher Reid. “Sadly coming out can still cause huge ruptures in relationships so be aware that this is a huge moment for them and comes with real consequences. “Dismissing their experience as ‘not a big deal’ because you think it’s ‘normal to be gay’ now is a dangerous and false narrative.” It may sound simple, but just listening and supporting them is vital. “Be there to listen and try to celebrate all the new things that they are exploring as they come out, whether that’s dating, meeting new people or finding ways to experiment with their identity through fashion,” says Fletcher Reid. “Repeat often that you love and care for them and that you accept this evolution of them, that you are happy to see them happy.” Suggest they find community “Encourage them to talk to other people who have been through similar experiences if you can,” she says. “As much as friends and family want to understand what they are going through, it is far more validating to talk to someone else who has come out later in life and understands the emotional intricacies of the experience. “They can also hopefully show them that there are good times ahead.” Thank them for sharing with you “It is a privilege that someone trusts you with coming out, especially later in life. Tell them that you are honoured to have been trusted with this information, and reassure them that you will keep it private until they are ready to tell other people,” Fletcher Reid suggests. “The best reactions that I had from people were seeing their joy that I had discovered this important part of myself, and that had a huge impact on my ability to feel hopeful amidst the pain caused by my divorce. “Allowing them to feel conflicted and guilty and offering reassurance that they have the right to be themselves will make them feel so much happier.” Read More Israel-Hamas conflict: How to talk to teenagers about distressing news stories Autumn décor ideas for a seasonal refresh Why you shouldn’t tidy your garden too much in autumn World Mental Health Day: 5 ways to beat anxiety and change your life Alternative veg to grow for next season How to spot if your child is struggling with their mental health – and what to do next
2023-10-11 14:25
IShowSpeed's reaction to Twitch reinstatement after 2-year ban goes viral, Internet dubs YouTuber 'corrupted'
Renowned live-streamer IShowSpeed made a triumphant return to Twitch after a two-year ban, sparking excitement in the streaming community
2023-10-11 14:20
Australian-Chinese journalist detained for 3 years in China returns to Australia
Australian Prime Minister Anthony Albanese says a Chinese-Australian journalist who was jailed for three years in China on a murky espionage conviction has returned to Australia
2023-10-11 14:16
Asia Stocks Rise on Fed Optimism, China Stimulus: Markets Wrap
Asian stocks rose to follow Wall Street higher after traders scaled back wagers on Federal Reserve rate hikes,
2023-10-11 13:53
Andrew and Tristan Tate face extended travel restrictions in Bucharest following appeal loss, trolls say '8x8 cell would be better'
Andrew Tate and Tristan Tate have reportedly been confined to Ilfov County and Bucharest for the next 60 days
2023-10-11 13:51
Rebecca Solomon: Ex-NYC reporter who was stranded in Israel with 8-month-old baby says Iron Dome saved her
Rebecca Solomon recounted what her family experienced when thousands of rockets were launched from the Gaza Strip
2023-10-11 13:49
Hurricane Lidia barrels inland after slamming Mexico coast; one dead
By Christian Ruano PUERTO VALLARTA (Reuters) -Hurricane Lidia slammed into Mexico's Pacific coast late on Tuesday as an "extremely dangerous
2023-10-11 13:48
Megyn Kelly claps back at trolls who forced Kylie Jenner to delete pro-Israel post
This comes after Kylie Jenner faced substantial backlash from her audience and had to remove her 'I Stand with Israel' post
2023-10-11 12:58
ACT test scores for US students drop to new 30-year low
High school students’ scores on the ACT college admissions test have dropped to their lowest in more than three decades, showing a lack of student preparedness for college-level coursework, according to the nonprofit organization that administers the test
2023-10-11 12:57
