Top Trump campaign aide Susie Wiles met numerous times with special counsel investigators in documents probe
A senior campaign official for Donald Trump was allegedly shown a classified map by the former president during a meeting at his New Jersey golf club after Trump left office, according to a source familiar with the matter.
2023-06-30 04:53
Malaysia court throws out abuse of power charges against former PM Muhyiddin
KUALA LUMPUR A Malaysian court on Tuesday threw out charges of abuse of power against opposition leader and
2023-08-15 11:59
I present my children on Instagram like they live in a fairytale – could it damage them?
Freshly cut roses. Sumptuous Marie Antoinette-style birthday cakes. Vintage Liberty dresses in Strawberry Thief fabric. Shetland ponies. These are some of the ingredients of my Instagram posts featuring my kids. I wouldn’t call myself a “sharent” by any means – someone who overshares their children’s intimate lives on social media in one long, parental “humblebrag”. But whenever I do post, it is picture-perfect. My kids look like they’ve walked straight out of a fairytale. But is it naff? Like tablescaping your kids? A form of digital narcissism? Is it, in its own unique way, a parental kind of “thirst trap”? To an extent, I’m luring others into a fantasy that doesn’t exist. I like to project a wonderfully idyllic life as a single mum... when quite frankly, it isn’t. It’s like when people try to woo their ex-partners back by posting shots of themselves half-naked and having the best time of their lives, despite crying into their pillow heartbroken all day and night. Some mums are professionals at posting perfect dreamy shots of their kids. Look no further than Carrie Johnson, Tamara Ecclestone, Stacey Solomon, and Kate and Rio Ferdinand. For celebrities and influencers, a picture-perfect ideal is the norm on social media – there are lots of cream interiors and matching Christmas jumpers. They might be promoting a homeware brand, or tagging a pram they got for free. Even when it’s tastefully done, like the former PM’s wife’s Instagram, it always gives the impression that motherhood is wondrous. That life is one big, happy Timotei advert. Even when celebrities try to be more candid, it doesn’t work. Mum-of-two Millie Mackintosh, formerly of Made in Chelsea, recently posted a “toddler tornado dump” on her Instagram. “I feel like it’s so easy to always share the nice, polished, life,” she wrote. “Well, today, I’m here to break that pattern.” The glimpse “into the delightful chaos” of Mackintosh’s maternal life included photos of a toothbrush and toothpaste on a bathroom basin, a bedroom littered with hair bows, and a make-up drawer with a few brown concealer stains on it. Really? Is that as bad as motherhood gets? For me, it’s simply more interesting to post magical rather than mundane shots. But why on earth do I want to present my kids as if they’re living in one long, tasteful pastel-coloured dream, where everything looks enchanting? No messy hair. No sleep deprivation. No kids bored out of their minds. I don’t require a filter, either – I’m already looking at life through rose-tinted spectacles, and expecting everyone else to do the same. But am I totally deluded? And, more than anything, could it be damaging to my children? Dr Charlotte Armitage, who is currently the duty-of-care psychologist on ITV’s Big Brother, has big concerns. “First of all, it’s impacting the relationship between the parent and a child because the relationship is contingent on the creation of these images and the number of likes that follow,” she says, adding that when you are “truly happy” with your situation, “you don’t tend to post perfect images”. It’s more important to ask ourselves the question of why we feel the need to present this kind of picture-perfect image of ourselves to the world. Is it because, in reality, we are discontented with our lives? Dr Charlotte Armitage, psychologist As parents, she continues, we are modelling behaviours to our children. “They learn by imitation – if mum is taking photos and seeking validation from likes, the child starts to become validated by these likes themselves and will develop an external focus of control; they will learn that validation comes from what others think of them. This is unhealthy because, throughout life, a child’s self-esteem and self-worth become based on what others think about them rather than how they feel about themselves.” The key, she says, is realising we shouldn’t use social media to fulfil our self-worth. “It’s more important to ask ourselves the question of why we feel the need to present this kind of picture-perfect image of ourselves to the world,” she says. “Is it because, in reality, we are discontented with our lives?” According to research, the average child today has had their image put on social media 1,300 times before the age of 13 – I can see this trajectory for my kids unless I put on the brakes. There are already widespread concerns over the data. In France, an anti-sharing bill continues to be discussed in the country’s senate, and parents could potentially be banned from sharing photos of their children on social media. It could also become mandatory for influencers to admit if a photo or video they posted was retouched or filtered. There is controversy over whether pictures of kids should even be posted online at all, as many are too young to even give permission. How will they feel about the spread of their image in the future? What happens if their identity is stolen – or worse, used by paedophiles? Does it promote a distorted reality of motherhood, compared with which other “normal” mums feel inadequate? And can it backfire on the parents when children’s rights in the digital era are not honoured? “Children tend to be frustrated or critical of the way their parents share images of them,” says Professor Sonia Livingstone, from the department of media and communications at the London School of Economics and Political Science. “Not because they are made to seem ‘perfect’ but because they can be embarrassed, even shamed, in the eyes of their peers. Meanwhile, parents feel hugely under pressure in many ways, both to be perfect parents and also because such images leave parents competing with each other and isolated in their own seemingly inadequate lives.” Dr Cosmo Duff Gordon is the founder of leading addictions clinic Start2Stop, and a psychologist in private practice at Chelsea Recovery Associates. He says that in his 20-year career as a psychologist, he’s “never had a parent sit in front of him and say ‘I’m addicted to Instagram,’” but that’s not because social media addiction doesn’t exist. He puts it largely down to “denial” – “not least since the use of social media can involve so many of the processes that usually characterise classic alcohol or drug addiction”. Denial being the number one culprit. “Obvious ones might be obsession, compulsion, capture of attentional focus and loss of control,” he says. “More subtly, social media use can involve the same sort of self-medication, or escape from reality, that addiction offers – and being a parent is hard. That’s why drifting into a fantasy land can be a relief from the daily grind of motherhood.” Parenting expert Hannah Keeley – aka “America’s #1 Mom Coach” – is more upbeat about mums posting potentially inauthentic photos of their kids. “The hardest truth to accept is that there are some mums who are actually professionalising motherhood to this level,” she says. “Not that they have achieved perfection, but they take pride in their performance as mums and use social media as a way to confirm that to themselves and boost their confidence to encourage their efforts. Should these mums also be obligated to ensure that all mums feel good about themselves, whether or not they have invested in their career to this level? Mums don’t have to be responsible for other mums’ perceptions.” After great debate and reflection, I’ve decided I’m happy with my Insta posts. They might be driven by my background, where my sister and I ran around in white nightdresses as if we had starring roles in Picnic at Hanging Rock. Or because I was conditioned to believe that how we look – even how thin we were – equalled self-worth. I’m not setting myself up to be a supermum. I don’t look at how many likes I get. It’s true that us mums also need to share our parenting experiences honestly, to let other mums know they are not alone. But for now, I’m not doing a U-turn – I’m just living the fairytale dream. Read More My daughter’s horsey hobby makes her happy, but our home now hums If poachers make the best gamekeepers, do siblings make the best babysitters? Mother’s song about how easy it is to be ‘such a good dad’ goes viral Will an adaptogen a day keep the doctor away this winter? Naomi Watts admits mid-thirties menopause felt like ‘the end of my worth’ Smoking causes 150 cancer cases every single day in UK, study finds
2023-11-20 14:47
Pope joins Meloni in urging Italians to have more kids, not pets
Pope Francis has joined Italy’s conservative premier in encouraging Italians to have more children after Italy registered a record low birth rate last year
2023-05-12 17:49
Ukraine urges world court to impose 'reparations' over Russia war
Ukraine on Tuesday said the International Court of Justice should impose reparations on Russia for its "war of annihilation", arguing that international...
2023-09-19 17:57
Actor Jonathan Majors in court for expected start of jury selection in New York assault trial
The actor Jonathan Majors has appeared in court in New York for the expected start of jury selection in a trial in which he is accused of injuring his then-girlfriend during an argument last spring
2023-11-30 00:58
'Boring' Feijoo plays stability card in bid to win Spain's election
By Charlie Devereux MADRID (Reuters) -Alberto Nunez Feijoo likes to cultivate a reputation for dullness - and it's a personality
2023-07-07 21:20
Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner decide to settle their daughters' custody battle 'amicably' after meditation
Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner will continue to alternate custody, allowing the girls to spend Thanksgiving with their father and Christmas with mother
2023-10-11 01:29
US space startups' latest struggles marked by layoffs, shake-ups
By Joey Roulette WASHINGTON U.S. space startups have slashed workforces and restructured operations to survive amid an investment
2023-08-16 00:21
Senate Democrats plan to subpoena Harlan Crow and Leonard Leo over Supreme Court justices' travel
Senate Democrats say they will subpoena Republican megadonor Harlan Crow and conservative activist Leonard Leo for more information about their roles in organizing and paying for luxury travel for Supreme Court justices
2023-10-31 11:24
Cardinals rally for 7-5 win over the Cubs to split London series
Paul Goldschmidt hit a go-ahead RBI single that chased Chicago starter Marcus Stroman in the fourth inning and the St. Louis Cardinals beat the Cubs 7-5 to earn a split of their weekend series at London Stadium
2023-06-26 03:54
Shooting outside wedding venue in Ottawa leaves 2 dead, 6 injured, police say
A shooting outside a wedding in Ottawa, Canada, on Saturday night has left two people dead and six injured, police say.
2023-09-04 04:59
You Might Like...
$5.6 million bid for one offshore tract marks modest start for Gulf of Mexico wind energy
Squeezed on Housing, Sunak’s Tories Take Aim at EU-Era Water Law
Brazil’s firefighters battle wildfires raging during rare late-winter heat wave
Dresden jewel theft: Five men convicted of audacious 2019 heist
South Carolina Senate passes 6-week abortion ban
Airbnb names Klain, former White House Chief of Staff, as chief legal officer
'You’re the meanest housewife': 'RHOC' star Tamra Judge's plea for BravoCon 2023 votes sparks roast fest
Dolphins rout Broncos 70-20, scoring the most points by an NFL team in a game since 1966
